MOM appears KID CRIES

[fireball]

ok. this last winter i had an issue i coudln't deal with well. I was teaching a little 9 year odl girl to snowboard. and she was doing soo awesome and was picking it up so fast. She was having a great time. Mom and dad came to watch, she instantly started to suck and then began to cry. She said she never wanted to snowboard again and quit trying. She kept bawling and saying "I can't, I can't" "i don't want to anymore" How would u handle this. She was doing great and i was so proud of her and really wanted her to keep at it! Eventually mom left and the little girl still decided to give up.

[DPancoast]

I dunno, that seems kinda strange. Sorry if Im in the wrong by posting in here (since Im not an official instructor) but the only things that I can really think of is to talk to them.

Then reassure them that they are doing great and that they shouldn't give up. If there's people around and they see it, try to let them notice so maybe they compliment her as well on how good she is doing. It seems kinda weird that as soon as her parents showed up to watch she started to suck....

[Naked Hiker]

tell the little girl to get new parents, sorry I now that doesn't help =)

[fireball]

oh everyone was complimenting her and trying to explain that it takes practice and she was doing well... she just woudlnt stop crying and quitting. i nearly cried myself i was so upset to see her give up.

[Fae]

Did you talk to her about why she suddenly gave up? I mean, apart from the rest of the students and everything. Kids sometimes freak out, and lot of times all it takes is a little bit of one on one time with them to find out what's up...I'll ask my best friend (who is an elementary school teacher) what she would do in a situation like that and I'll get back to you.

[fireball]

she had a private lesson.. just her and i.. later her friend came who snowboarded and planned to take her to colorado if she learned to board. her friend kept saying shes a better begginner then she was. I did ask her parentce to bounce so i could try to get her to ride again. she refused. it was so weird and heart breaking. the girl was truly doing excellent. best ive seen a child do so quickly.

[capita_bitch]

I'm betting you haven't seen the influence of parents much.

Having a parent around or even within watching distance of a lesson (where the child can see the parent) definitely can hinder or help the lesson progress. From the many lessons i've taught, i've only had one parent actually help a lesson and that was with a child who had a learning disability so having the parent around helped a great deal. For the hundreds of other lessons, the parents end up effecting the lesson to no return.

I tell parents that during lessons it's a good idea for them to ski/ride on their own but if they do want to watch, do it without being noticed by the child. It distracts the child from the lesson, it makes them resort to being a child (acting out) and it makes them want to show off when i'm still trying to teach them.

In your case, the parents obviously affected the girl to where she was reminded she was being watched and needed to change that.

[fireball]

I've seen the influence capita bitch, i just think its ridiculous. i realize some kids just look desperately for comfort and sympathy from there parents. The parents were not there to help her learn. They were there b/c i told them to come see how wonderful she was doing and that they would be proud. i was already talking to them about getting her a board of her own.

I send the parents away later, but she simply wouldnt stop bawling and wanting to give up.

[Big Bears Realtor]

as a parent I would want to know that she gave up once she saw me. Maybe the parent is too hard on her. I would also talk to the kid and see if there is another issue that maybe no one knows about.

A tip with kids make snowboarding a game for the younger kids it works. That is what I do with my 6 yr old and 4 yr old.

[fireball]

well im not the kids therapist so i am not about to pry into her life. i could lose my job.

[Big Bears Realtor]

Im not saying to do that just asking her what is wrong would work.

[Snow Wolf]

Kids are tough....I have had similar experiences and the only thing I can tell you is not to beat yourself up over it. It is`nt you; sometimes there is just nothing we as instructors can do. Quite possibly, she was just "done" and she was`nt really aware of it untill mom shows up, then all of the supressed emotions just spill over like a dam break. I have noticed that kids tend to put on the brave act and then just fall apart when mom or dad is around. The only "trick" which really is`nt as it`s what is recomended in the AASI book, is to make the lesson all about play and having fun. You got to teach the kid skills, but make it so the kid does`nt realize it`s learning time...they think it`s play and fun time. I have had days where the kid or kids are just not into it no matter what you do.....thats when its time to have a snowball fight or build a snowman....sometimes its all you can do and at least the kid had fun which is really what MOST parents want anyway. I think you did everything right on the mark and you have nothing to feel bad about....look at it this way, you know the kid learned something, possibly a lot. She may not act like it then, but at some point later on, what you gave her will make a difference.

[fireball]

wow snow wolf. i suppose your right on. For the last 5 and a half months ive been thinkning about it over and over again about how i could have done things differently for a better result. And i suppose i did all i could at the time. i suppose she was just done. And your prolly right that, even though she quit, i still gave her something useful.. and i hope what that is is an opportunity to try again later in her life. She has the basics, now she needs the will and want. From there.. she will do well. i just hope she tries again. Thanks.... i appreciate your useful thoughs.

[signal_snowboards]

ever tried to teach a 14-year old slave-to-the-pop-culture/fashion-girl how to ride? yikes! now talk about hard. i picked my cousin up at her house one day when i *attempted* to teach her how to ride.... she was wearing more makeup than a clown. i really got a laugh, though, when she took off her goggles at the end of the bluebird day and her eye makeup was running. hahahaha.. but that's not of any help to you.

maybe just her parents watching her made her stressed out... as long as you did everything you could to give her as many resources for learning to ride, you did your part. now it's up to her to realize that snowboarding is the best thing in the world and she's missing some glorious, glorious times on the mountain... i wouldn't stress it too much.

[DragonUSMC]

I've run into this many times... But insted of being a private lesson it usually happens in a large group, and one or two simply do not want to learn and or pay attation. I have noticed over the years, whenever grandparents / parents / friends / wives / husbands / etc. Show up the personality of the person will change... and i've noticed it to be one of these two. Excited and wanted to demonstrate current progress... or, I guess i'm going to use Embarrased / shy.

My old man has been a golf pro for over 30 years... I've been doing this for like 10 now or so... But one thing he told me is true for snowboarding as it is golf. (this is mainly for older people but whatever) Your lesson's BIGGEST fear is not, being bad at snowboarding... They are afraid of looking stupid. Which is why they dont do the proper snowboard stance when doing glides and traverses and such.

I've noticed the younger kids do one of two different things also... Excited again and wanting to show whomever said accomplishments. Or baby like and non-comprimising. I ALWAYS try and keep my lessons pointed downhill, so that they dont even catch a glimps of their parents while in the lesson. But if all else fails... i keep hot cocoa, and the newest snowboard DVDs in the ski school room. =/

I think you handled it just how you should have for that situation... There was no right answer, and instantly as you reached that point her mind was made up and that was gonig to be that. =( But i understand... I love when i can make someone's eyes light up and see how stoked they are about riding after a lesson... and it really brings me down when i cant do that to everyone...

[fireball]

That makes sense.. i can totally see that this little girl excelled in most everything she did in life, and this was harder for her. i think she was afraid of looking stupid and maybe letting her parents down, so she sorta cracked under the pressure.. i honestly believe i have fully figured out the psychology behind the incident. I just wish i could have used the perfects words or perfect actions to relieve her of her self-consciousness.

One thing about living in a small town and working at a small hill is that i get to see these students out and about. i don't usually remember a lot of them, but i have twice had a parent stop me at a store and thank me for the lesson and how proud they were of there child and what a difference it made. so.. i guess i should just keep my mind on all the kids who now have learned a life long sport because of me.

[Snow Wolf]

Thats why we do this.....feels really good does`nt it when that happens?

[fireball]

its my reason

[andes tower hills]

thats to bad it's cool watching little kids rip up the hill to bad

[andrewhyman]

i had a kid like that and all i said was that its ok to fall and even i fall and im stil learning and **** becasue this kid got pushed by his dad soo much had all the best gear had better **** than me and the intrustor at the time and i had to help him cuz he was like me when i was little slow learner but once i got it i kept it for life i still love to ride and teach i moved to tx soo it sucks but all i told the kid was keep your head up its ok if u get hurt cuz his mom and dad got hurt like 2 weeks back and i was like its ok can u still move it and if u cant move it than ill go get ski portoll and if u can lets try and get up and make it down the hill and see how you do and u just got to keep the confdence up

[ridecrazy4life]

I know im not an instructor but i do work at the YMCA and this girl has probably had a lot of pressure on her for something in her life and her parents probably always say something. but that is the only thing that i can think of hope that helps you.

[4shayz2lounge0crew]

im sure she was just embarassed- if it happens again wtih another student, take them for a walk up the hill so that the parents are out of sight.

im sure she'll be fine and eventually go again. if you do work with her again per a request, then tell the parents beforehand not to swing by until after the lesson is completely over. i wouldnt lose sleep over it...

[pepsi and milk]

Id just give her the old motivation speeches. I was in the same experience level in snowboarding for a while, but what kept me from giving up is motovation. Just tell her never to give up, you're doing fine, belive it, etc.

[DragonUSMC]

^its a little bit more complicated then that though in aspect to a snowboard lesson.

[Leo B. Jibbins]

i work with kids. i now hate them, and there parents. parents should be no where near a lesson. ever. never ever. im currently switching to the adults SB school, because i hate having to baby sit these ****ty little video game addicts who think that snowboarding is gonna b eazy. and **** the kids who fake injurys too, im sick of filling out injury reports for no reason, cause once i tell them were gonna get hot chocolate, they are miraculasly cured

[DragonUSMC]

the healing effects of hot chocolate have been over looked by the medical community. I've heard that it cures cancer and also is the only thing that brings weakness to Chuck Norris...

[Mighty Sasquatch]

the healing effects of hot chocolate have been over looked by the medical community. I've heard that it cures cancer and also is the only thing that brings weakness to Chuck Norris...

LMAO ahhhaaaa, yea but taking a nice little break its probally the best way to get her back on the mt, its practice at my mt that you ask parents to avoid the lesson.

[DragonUSMC]

^yeah mine too.. I tell them i'll fill em in at the end of the lesson when they come to pick up their kid... but yeah sometimes chilling for 10 mins and having a cocoa and watching a few mins of one of my snowboarding videos is all it takes to get em pumped up again.